About Me

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I am a licensed therapist with a thriving practice in Illinois. As a youth I didn't have any friends but as I got older I found ways to make people like me. Since then I have taken it upon myself to fix other peoples' friendship problems. I like to drive long distances in my car with no destination in mind, just until the gas runs out of my car. Afterwards, I will often abandon the car and walk home.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Adopted Friend

clxxxxx78@gmail.com to advisegi9@gmail.com
Dear R. Snarfin,
I have a friend named Ted. The other night Ted's dad was drunk and told me that Ted is actually adopted but doesn’t know it. Do I have to tell Ted?

Not yet. Hang onto this juicy piece of info like it’s the hydrogen bomb.

One day (and it could be years from now) Ted is gonna slip up and do something dumb like call you a Jive Turkey. As soon as he does, then you can tell him, “Oh by the way, you’re adopted. Have a nice life.”
---Snarfin
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