Fickle Friend

xxxxxxiam@aol.com to advisegi9@gmail.com

Dear Mr. Snarfen,
After six years of being my BFF, my best friend told me we couldn’t be friends anymore. She became best friends with our mutual friend for 2 weeks and then came back to me. Should I let her be my best friend again after she ditched me once?

Dear Desperate,
Never forgive. Never forget. Once a person harms me I make a hash mark in my diary. Two harms = two hash marks. Three harms = you’re already dead.
---Snarfin

RIP, Friend

jaimeexxxx to advisegi9@gmail.com
Dear Richard,
My good friend of over 50 years just died of heart problems. I cherish my friend and want to buy him a nice headstone but his family doesn't want to spend much money on the burial. Is it weird if I ask his family if I can buy the headstone for them?


Dear Freak,
Please stop contacting my family. We don’t need any more headstones.
---Snarfin

Racist Friend

bradleyk67xxxx@comcast.net to advisegi9@gmail.com
Dear Mr. Snarfin,
My best friend of several years is black. I am white and don't have any racial prujuidices whatsoever but some of my other friends do and they say racist things about Ralph behind my back. Should I confront my other friends or just let it go?


Dear Racist,
Who makes more money? Ralph or your other white friends? My money is on your white friends so stick with them. They sound more funny and interesting than Ralph anyway.
---Richard Snarfin