What should I watch on TV?

Hello Richard,

First of all, thanks for all the great advice over the years.  Your suggestions on how to bring back to life my cockerspaniel didn’t work but I appreciate you trying when no one else would.  Here is my question: all of my friends tell me I should watch “Game of Thrones” but I just don’t want to have to get into another show.  Should I do it?

-Ralph

Ralph,

I don’t know what “Game of Thrones” is but I think I found a way to bring your dead dog back to life.  Direct-Tweet me your phone number and I will call you back from a pay phone.

-Snarfin

Advise guy?

Hey Richard,

I heard you went to jail --?  Why the hell should I listen to anything you have to say?

-JorReeds_Gab

Hi Joe,

First, let me say that I understand your reluctance to take advice from a jail bird but let me tell you a story.  Here it goes: fuck you.  I learned that in prison.

Also, if you want to know how to fashion moonshine from No More Tears Shampoo, just drop me another message.

R.

I'm Back, Everyone!

(First, the good news: the American prison system works!)

Dear Readers,
Your friendly friendship therapist has been locked up for the last few years because like Henry Thoreau, I didn't pay taxes.  Including sales tax.  When I bought hot dogs at the zoo and those fascists tried to charge me 10% on top of the sales price, I subtracted the 10 cents from the amount (in quarters) I intended to pay them.

Needless to say, a bunch of cops kicked down my living room door in 2009 for tax evasion.

Neighbor's (Dale) photo from across the street

After an arduous trial in which I represented myself, I was convicted and sent to the Joliet Prison.

While incarcerated I learned a lot more about friendship that I am happy to relate to you in the months to come while I re-learn all my internet passwords.  (Note to self: in the future try to refrain from only using 4 letter expletives.)




In the meantime, please feel free to send me your queries while I work on getting my medical license back.

I am also selling some personal items to pay the $86,000 I owe in back taxes to Uncle Sam.  I included pictures and prices for these gems.  Feel free to bid on them.

     

                 

Last, when I tell people at my Korean church that I just got out of jail, I am often greeted with this question: "Did you find Islam?"  The answer is a big no.  But what I did find was an exhaustive desire to answer my fans' queries on my blog.

Looking forward to hearing from all of you!

Carpe the Diem,
Prisoner #768984

PS: I don't have a bank account since my assets were frozen so I can't use Paypal for transactions.  If you wish to send me money, use money orders or simply send cash in the mail.