Why Does My Cat Lick Me?

Query: Why does my cat lick me?

Answer: Sometimes it's for the salt on you skin, but most often it's a sign that they have accepted you as part of their family, the same way they wash each other.

From: http://74.125.93.132/search?q=cache:D1TvEZ2ACg0J:home.att.net/~kathfreeman/faqs.html+why+does+my+cat+lick+me&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us

Why Does My Belly Button Smell?

Query: Why does my belly button smell?

Answer: "It's because your belly button is warm and moist because it never gets fresh air ( if you have an inner, which I do ) and that is the ideal home for bacteria, so what you smell is the odor of the waste that the bacteria gives off after eating the sweat... It's very similar to your armpits or when you sweat and don't take a shower."

From: http://www.blurtit.com/q289878.html

You're Welcome, America

I've been so busy these days with electric shock treatments and lobotomies that I often don't have time to individually address every query that comes through my inbox.

I still want to give something back to humanity though, so I decided that I would do the next best thing. I am going to offer you answers to your Google searches. That's right, jerkface!

Each day I am going to pick the most interesting query I can and offer you the answer based on the internet's response. Check it out below!

Career Planning Advice

Amysometime@jfkschool.edu to advisegi9@gmail.com
Hey Dick Snarfin,
I am a high school counselor. Part of my job is recommending careers for graduating seniors.

With the job market in the trash can, it's hard for me to be optimistic about a lot of these kids' chances. Should I be honest? What should I tell them?


Here's what I would say to those idealistic young students if I were you. Why not join the military?

It's fun. You get to meet a lot of interesting people and handle dangerous weapons.

It pays great and there is no downside. Problem solved.
---Colonel Snarfin

The Snarfin Blog Just Got Better!

Gentle Readers,
I get so many emails that have nothing to do with friendship. Some of them are just angry people looking to vent by comparing me to Hitler. (Those hurt, guys!)

Many other emails come from people concerned with making my penis bigger. (Thanks! I am looking into it.)

But some of the emails I get contain guidance questions that don't relate to my specialty: friendship.

As part of my effort to be a complete guide and life therapist I have started answering queries that deal with issues besides Friendship. Get ready for the first of many more exciting and instructive blog updates to come.
---Snarfin