Too busy to Talk to Mom

Mr. Snarfin,

I’ve recently transferred college to purse my passion for Marine Biology.  My Mother bought me an iPad hoping it would keep us close, i.e. Facebook, Skype, etc.  but I’m too busy to be constantly talking to her.  How do I tell her that?

Thanks! ;)

Julie C.

Julie,

You’re probably smarter than I am but I think you know the answer.  Sell the iPad, take the money and buy an arsenal of alcohol.  Develop what will begin as a minor drinking problem.  This is sure to bring you two closer than ever.

Have a great semester,

Richard.