Olympic Friend

SallyCaruthers8xxxx@cox.net to advisegi9@gmail.com
Dear Mr. Snarfin,
This is soooo crazy! My friend Chuck lives in Chi-Town but my in-laws are from Rio. I'm so exicited and I want to be happy for my relatives cause they just got the Olympics but I don't want to upset Chuck because Chicago didn't get it. What do I do?


Dear Idiot,
Here is a fact you may not have considered when sending me your insipid question: one day everyone you know and love will be dead.
---Snarfin

Son Vs. Senior Friend

oceanfrontloverxx@aol.com to Advisegi9@gmail.com

Mr. Snarfin,
My father recently suffered a mild heart attack and it’s become difficult for him to get around. Now that I’m his Caretaker, I’m looking for a way to balance my active lifestyle with his.

I want my father to feel that I’m still thinking about him. How do I approach discussing this with him?


It’s called a television set. Move your couch in front of it, sit him down, and go about your day.
---Snarfin